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Tuesday, September 28, 2004

My boss went to Canada and sent us his number:

HELP! I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY SOME ESKIMOS -- THEY SAY THAT ONLY YOUR "COLD CASH" CAN SAVE ME--PLEASE PUT ALL THE MONEY YOU HAVE IN THE FREEZER, THEN MAIL IT UP TO ME (<--crossed out) THE KIDNAPPERS! KASIA, DID MY FED-EX PACKAGE ARRIVE YET?

HOWIE HOSTAGE
1-902-888-5522
PHONE AND FAX

P.S. CAN YOU FAX THIS BACK TO ME AS A TEST? THANKS!

Sunday, September 26, 2004

If I were a chipmunk...

We were sitting patiently in the front seat of the car, getting the oil changed.
"Hey, looks like the squirrels like your car, too," commented the mechanic.
"Huh?"
He produced the air filter. Complete with a charming assortment of acorns, pecans, and other unidentifiables. "Would you like that replaced?"
"Uh, yeah. Sure."
Classic John Wayne

"You swear too much."
"The hell I do!"

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

The boys were measuring each other up, comparing notes on the Philokalia and who'd read more of it.
"I think I got through about three pages of the commentary," she put in, "before I was distracted by something shiny."
And I knew I'd found a lifelong friend.

Sunday, September 19, 2004

Trader Joe's is officially my New Favorite Store

28 (very good) truffles for $2.99. Yoikes!

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Great lines:

"I don't like rain. It tickles."
"Tickles?"
"Well, it does."

"The one saving grace of bureaucracy has always been its inability to carry out its schemes."

Me, pulling a water gun from my desk drawer at work: "What's this?"
Kasia, with a shrug: "Office equipment."

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